Calgon, Take Me Away

I have been back in K-town for one week now and I'm already wishing I had never returned. Ah, to be back at the shore, free from dealing with the hell that is competetive baseball. I made the mistake of traveling to Sevier County yesterday to watch the son play some ball and spent the rest of the afternoon wishing I had stayed home.

It is so disheartening to come to a beautiful stadium, excited to see your child play in a professional facility and realize you're surrounded by complainers, moaners, criticizers, excuse-makers, finger-pointers, back biters -- the list goes on for days. And these, my friends, are the PARENTS. Sigh...

I have spent much of the season away, preferring to receive my game updates via text message from Joe just so I don't have to drown myself in the muck and yuck of being a spectator at one of these tournaments. But yesterday the games were at Smokies Stadium, and the girls and I thought it would be fun to see them play in such a nice facility. The facility was beautiful. J. played well (though that is not exactly the story if you talk to his uncle about it, but it never is the story if you talk to his uncle about it) and you could just see how much fun he was having. It literally made my heart happy to see him enjoying playing again. Made me wish for one minute that this wasn't the end of the road for all this baseball stuff.

That was not a typo. This is it, the grand finale, for Joe B. in the competitive baseball arena -- Thank God. May be the end of the road for the kid, too, if you believe what he's been saying for the last couple of months. It isn't a picture perfect going away party, but it'll do. Even though I have prayed for years for an end to the stress that goes along with all of it, it is still a little sad to think we will no longer be part of this particular *team* next year. The truth is, though, we haven't felt part of the *team* this year anyway, not even among the other family members taking part in team activities. And once you're an outsider in your own circle, trust me, it's time to hit the road.

So with relieved heart, Joe has made the decision to focus on the softball and leave the baseball behind. He enjoys coaching the girls more anyway because they tend to listen better (at least at this young age they do!) and right now, even with the crazy mamas that come with softball, everything seems less stressful. Joe and I made a pact early on that we would not make the same mistake with Kel that we did with J., going competitive so young. We will play for the enjoyment of it and try to avoid the mess that we find ourselves in now with the baseball. With the exception of a couple of minor bumps, so far, so good.

So today, Joe is in Jefferson City, coaching first base, supporting, cheering, wanting to win, even though his child watches from the dugout...again. Joe is the best person I know. Even though it's almost too hard to watch, too hard to go every weekend never knowing whether he will be cheering for his kid or just everybody else's, he goes. Even though he gets blamed when tournament schedules aren't exactly right, he still coordinates tournaments. Even though he gets blamed when the team budget is busted because of expensive uniforms and Christmas parties, he still hands out coaches' money on trips and pays the team credit card bill. For me, I do not have the stomach for it anymore. It causes too much upset. But, ever the optimist, he keeps the faith.

Speaking of faith, I watched a movie called Evan Almighty the other night (not great, but a decent time filler). I mention it because there is a part in the movie where God says to Evan's wife, "When you pray for patience, do you think God gives you patience or gives you the opportunity to be patient? When you pray for a stronger family, does God just make you stronger or does he give your family the opportunity to strengthen?" And that has been in my mind ever since. I have prayed for an end to this baseball business for a long time, but never wanting it to end with Joe and J. being treated like the invisibles, only just for it to end. But then I got to thinking, I prayed for it and maybe this is the way God is offering the opportunity for the prayer to be answered. We shall see...

Well, folks, I'm off to lovely Crossville for some softball action this weekend. Hope your weekend is sunny and bright!

~Peace