Thoughts

I had an interesting weekend this weekend -- the usual flurry of activity, but also a reflective one. My 20th high school reunion was this weekend. I, for a myriad of reasons, chose not to go. As one would expect, there are a flurry of e-mails flying around today about the reunion, pictures being sent, general pleasantries being exchanged amongst the participants. I thought I might feel sad afterwards when everyone was talking about what went on, feeling like I missed something.

But strangely, seeing the pictures and reading the e-mails only makes me feel better about my decision. 20 years down the road I'm actually exactly where I had hoped to be when I was graduating from KCHS. I had hoped I would have a husband and a family to call my own, a pretty little house, a LIFE of my own. And I do. To some people, I'm sure those things aren't high on the wish list, but for me, they always were.

So looking back at where I was and where I am helps me see how much of the mountain I've climbed -- and also how far I've got to go. So I didn't slam back too much alcohol with my old high school buddies this weekend, I didn't trot all my kids out to the *family picnic*, I didn't Botox my face, highlight my hair, go to the tanning bed and put on my obligatory little black dress (Okay, in my case, maybe not so little, but still black!) for the dinner/dance either.

What did I do? I took my precious 6 year old daughter to the emergency room when she couldn't get her breath. I taught my third-grader about simple subjects and simple predicates. I laughed with my friend as she told me how excited she was about moving into her new house and about all the crazy stuff she had bought to go in it. I went shoe shopping with Sydney and went to church Saturday night with my family. I helped Kelsey push cloves into an apple until my fingers ached, covering it with cinnamon and wrapping it in a pretty bow -- a special project for school. I spent an entire hour talking with my husband about our life, our beliefs, our children -- probably one of only a handful of times we've ever found a full uninterrupted hour since the kids arrived.

Sound boring? Maybe. But I'll take it. I'll take it and I'll hold it as tightly as I can until the day I'm gone. I used to think if I didn't follow the crowd I would miss something, be left behind, and I guess I feared I would feel that way again if I didn't jump on the reunion bandwagon. But after spending the weekend pondering it, I realize that's not my crowd anymore.

So to the Class of '87, the old crowd, I hope it was a blast. To the new crowd, a million thanks for helping me see I'm not missing a thing!